Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

Some years ago in Hong Kong I was walking back to the office after a liquid lunch with some colleagues. Along Pottinger Street there are a lot of fancy dress stalls. One of the girls in the group decided it was the perfect time to try on a a few coloured wigs and feather boas.

She was pretty enough but no more than average. In a pink wig however she sent shockwaves down my spine and I had to duck behind the George W Bush halloween masks to adjust my trousers.

Asian girls quite often put highlights in their hair, it’s very attractive. Once in a while you see one with their hair dyed blonde but this is quite rare. A shame because it’s really very sexy. Brightly coloured wigs are just visual viagra but outside of Japanese cosplay you never see Asian girls wearing them. Even in porn it is rare.

I’m all wet

Me, I’ve been off mountain biking in China. Pedaling furiously between mysterious pinnacles of limestone. Stopping occasionally to catch my breath as I round a gnarled and bushy karst to catch sight of emerald green rice fields and the sound of children’s laughter echoing of the rock.

Such wholesome pursuits provide me with a great deal of recreation plus little income but rural China is not a great place for getting your leg over. There’s no shortage of hot babes but unless you are the marrying kind they are firmly out of bounds.

Anyway I slunk back into Hong Kong with the intention of winging down to Bangkok pronto only to discover that the City of Angels is in danger of joining Atlantis on the bottom of the ocean. A few phone calls put my mind at ease. Yes, the bars are still serving and “Please come to Bangkok Khun Seymour, no have customer” they all wailed.

What with floods, red shirts, yellow shirts, avian flu and so on and so forth - it seems like every year something fucks up the peak tourist season. So if you had been planning a trip don’t cancel just because of t bit of water. The girls will be really pleased to see you.

A client of mine is an enthusiastic tit-man. I discovered this over refreshments one evening. He was extolling the virtues of his accountants new secretary; “They are whoppers,” he said, spreading his palms out to demonstrate. “You don’t often see Asian gals with boobs that size.”

It’s true, big tits are the exception rather than the norm amongst Asian women but they can be found. I know a working lass in Hong Kong who has a wonderful pair. Full globes that sit heavy in the palm of your hand and between which your cock can disappear.

He introduced me to the accountant next time I was over at his office. Now I’m not particular I like tits of all sizes but, it has to be said, these were jolly impressive.

			The phrase was originally used back in the days of the Vietnam war when GIs used it as a term for endearment for their girlfriends. I came across it in the 1980s when I first went to Hong Kong. Back then it was used to describe the girls that hung out The Pussycat and the Makati discos in Wanchai. Most of those girls were Filipinas who were domestic helpers in the daytime and making a little extra on the side on weekends. The phrase was also applied to Cathay Pacific air hostesses, at least for a while. Author Simon Winchester made mention of it in his introduction to the Book Here be Dragons in 1997. Apparently he was informed, the next time he tried to board a cathay flight, that it was already full.

See also: Class of 88
See also: Thai Cuties

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The word banana comes from the African language wolof but probably arrived in the English via Portuguese or Spanish. Archaeological evidence suggests that they were first cultivated in Papua New Guinea as far back as 5,000 BCE. They come in a range of sizes and there are even purple/reddish coloured varieties.

Bananas are rich in potassium and the vitamins C and B6. These help in the building of muscles and protein synthesis. The potassium stimulates nerve impulses for muscle contraction. A diet rich in potassium can reduce the risk of hypertension and stroke. And since bananas are free from sodium they can also help reduce high blood pressure.

The vitamins C and B6 help the body to defend against and heal infections. They also help in the synthesis of antibodies in the immune system apart from red blood formation, protein metabolism and functioning of the central nervous system

No other fruit contain more digestible carbohydrates. This is good because, the body burns off calories from carbohydrate more easily and quickly than calories from fat or protein.

Tussinee loves bananas and I love watching her peel.

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