Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

I get the impression sometimes that lots of people think a ‘girlfriend experience’ is something elusive and mysterious. In case there is anyone who doesn’t know the term, a girlfriend experience is a rendezvous with a sex worker who … well … behaves more like a girlfriend than a sex worker.

She is someone who is good at giving the impression that she actually likes you and enjoys having sex with you rather than just lying back and counting the dollar signs. Well of course, that is the kind of service we all prefer but what baffles me is why some people think it is harder to find than the golden fleece itself.

I was talking to a girl the other day who made me think about this. We’d just had a post coital doze and were getting dressed. “Thank you,” she said, “you make me happy.” I told her that I was glad that I could make her cum too.

“Not only,” she said. “Last customer was a very boring man, he no smile, he no talk. I feel very scare … so I make him cum very quickly. He pay 2 hour but him finish, him go 30 minutes only. He not say anything but I afraid he angry … but now I happy again,” and she gave me a big hug.

Sex work is a risky business and you can understand some girls being a bit reserved at first. Of course, there are those that are never going to lighten up but for the most part my encounters are always cheerful and friendly. They are human beings and they respond well to being treated as such.

It seems Christmas cracker Xuan-Vy provoked quite a few erections out there. I think it was the cute little red hat that did it, after all there are sweet shaved pussies aplenty lying around. I’ve got to admit though, the lass simply oozes sex.

Xuan-Vy is Vietnamese, at least her name is Vietnamese, that’s the only thing I know about her. But she does remind me of a girl I met in Laos a couple of years ago for some reason. I don’t suppose they looked that much alike really and the Lao girl kept her clothes on at all times. She just wanted to practice her English.

At the end of the conversation we shook hands. Her handshake was firm and strong, her hands small and muscular. Made so, no doubt, by a childhood spent working in the fields. The were a little rough but nothing a little baby oil couldn’t fix. I’m convinced she would have been able to administer a sublime hand-job. Alas she was currently employed by the restaurant we were sitting in and the chance of smuggling her out for a spot of freelance seemed remote.

Another gallery here, See also the Christmas Cracker gallery

I know a girl who has a goldfish on her right shoulder. “It’s not finished yet!” she pleaded when I asked if I could take a picture of it. And when are you going to get it finished? She told me the next time she goes back up country and has enough money to pay for it.

Tattoos can get quite expensive. This one covers almost all of her right shoulder and is intended to spread all the way down her back incorporating several more fish. The goldfish as a symbol is intended to attract wealth and harmony in both business and personal affairs.

I told her that when she got it finished I would pay her good money to pose nude and show it off. “You give me money I go get it finished tomorrow.” I told her that if I gave her that kind of money she would have to have more than the tattoo artists needle stuck into into her. “Deal!,” she beamed and we sealed it with a high five.

Here’s a trio of delicious, brown shaved pussies. Why? Because they are trio of delicious, brown shaved pussies. What other reason could you need? Oh all right, they are called Emelie, Maya, and Janelyn.

This is Xuan-Vy, she’s Vietnamese and she wants to tell you where you can stick your Christmas pudding!

Call me Scrooge but I don’t like Christmas. Oh I’m all for peace on earth and goodwill to all mankind, you never see any of that though. You get shopping malls engorged with even more crap than usual playing background music that makes you want to punch people.

The best thing about Christmas is girls wearing Santa hats. It makes me want to fuck them. Of course I’d probably still want to fuck them even if they weren’t wearing Santa hats.

Some years ago in Hong Kong I was walking back to the office after a liquid lunch with some colleagues. Along Pottinger Street there are a lot of fancy dress stalls. One of the girls in the group decided it was the perfect time to try on a a few coloured wigs and feather boas.

She was pretty enough but no more than average. In a pink wig however she sent shockwaves down my spine and I had to duck behind the George W Bush halloween masks to adjust my trousers.

Asian girls quite often put highlights in their hair, it’s very attractive. Once in a while you see one with their hair dyed blonde but this is quite rare. A shame because it’s really very sexy. Brightly coloured wigs are just visual viagra but outside of Japanese cosplay you never see Asian girls wearing them. Even in porn it is rare.