Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

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“Wah!”, they said in unison. In Chinese it’s the all encompassing expression of surprise. The people that said it were four new recruits who had arrived from China late the night before.

I had gone there to give a farewell bonk to a lady who had become a bit of a regular over the previous few weeks. I’d seen one of the girls asleep on the sofa when I arrived. This sort of thing is not unusual and I just ignored her.

She was still asleep when we passed to go to the shower. Where’s the other girl that is usually here I asked. “Go back already,” she said. She was giving a lot of attention to the old todger and I’ve always been a bit of a sucker for a pair of soapy hands so I closed my eyes and enjoyed myself.

Just when it was as big and shiny as it could get she pushed me out of the shower. I wrapped the customary flimsy towel around as best I could and headed back to the bedroom. I was than that I discovered the girl on the sofa had not only woken up but had been joined by three others.

“Wah!” The towel was doing bugger all to hide my stiffy so I just pulled it aside and let it point proudly at the ceiling “Wah!” They said again.

By this time my girl had emerged. She grabbed the towel from me and hung it on my dick. “No no no,” she said, “They never see foreign man before”. Really I asked and, being the genial fellow that I am, pulled the towel away again and invited them all to come and have a squeeze. And they all did … until they realised they should be doing such things for free.

After the business had been done we went back out and sat around with the girls for a while. They were all students from Changsha in Hunan province. College is expensive and conventional part-time jobs just don’t make ends meet.

As I was leaving my young lady told me that I must come back next time because they all want to try a big western dick.

And you know what?, I think I probably will.

See also: Enter the Dragons Lair
See also: The sweetest smile
Free pics: Shaved China Pussy

. . . Elope with Carol, click here

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I had a girlfriend who looked just like Carol here. But her father was very traditional, he believed that Hong Kong girls should only date Hong Kong men. Westerners could date who they wanted so long as none of them were his daughter.

We did see each other a lot though. We would take late night walks along parts of the harbour where few other people ever went. A sort of lovers lane where we could grope. But there were other couples that had gone there for the same reason so we could only go so far. She would never come to my apartment or to a short-time hotel.

Then one day fate took me off to Bali for a few days. “Why don’t you make a holiday of it?” she asked, “Because if you did, I could fly down the day after you”

So I did my work in Kuta and Denpasar and then we spent two blissful weeks together at Lovina, on Bali’s north shore. It’s a gorgeous place but there’s not much to do except eat, sleep and fuck … so that’s what we did.

I asked what her father thought about this. “Hah!, he thinks I’m on a package tour with my friends” she replied.

Don’t click, just think about my pussy

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“Wow”, she said as my jocks dropped to the floor. “Wow” she said again as she squeezed my thickening dick in the shower. Complementing a client on the size of his dick is a good business practice for working girls and most of them would tell you it was a whopper even if you were hung like a gnat.

But like most men, I consider myself to be only slightly above average, I’m certainly no Desmond donkey drawers. This young lass thought otherwise. “Wow” she said as I lay on my back reaching full stretch.

At this point she bottled. She was one of the student types that hop over the border from Shenzhen to hook for a week or so and stock up on Louis Vuitton bags and shoes.

Now I’m not sure what her boyfriends across the border might be like but it prompted me to drop a line to my old friend Captain Outrageous to ask if, in his considerable experience, he thought there was any truth in the notion that Asian dicks are significantly smaller than western dicks.

“I’ve no idea,” chortled the Captain, “I’ve not really had any experience with western dicks other than my own … and that’s a monster! Most of my ladyboy friends have to stand up in the taxi going home”

But I digress. The lady was sitting on the bed next to me fashioning a small circle with her thumb and index finger. “Smar” she said pointing at her pussy with her other index finger. Then she grabbed my cock and said; “Big”. She offered me a hand job. I made it clear that I hadn’t travelled across Hong Kong for a hand job but she was not interested. I took one last look at her tight little pussy put my clothes back on an left.

I’ve no interest in making the girl feel uncomfortable and, in retrospect, I was grateful that she refused. I have known girls who take another approach and slather on way too much KY. The problem with this is that lube gets inside the condom and the thing slips off. And that’s a risk that neither of us need.

So I tried another door, another student from China, but this one was much more enthusiastic.

Lynette Wong; because she’s hotter than Bruce Lee

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I went back to Kowloon Tong for the first time in ages. It’s a surprisingly low rise area in the craggy shadow of Lion Rock. There is a sleepy residential area just to the west of Waterloo Road where Hong Kong’s most famous film star, Bruce Lee, used to live.

These days, though there are still a few residences, most of the well appointed buildings have been converted to kindergartens or love hotels. Bruce Lee’s old house, 41 Cumberland Road, is the latter - discretely named Ross Hotel.

I had stayed here numerous times in the past. I was having an affair with a married woman. Her husband was away on business half the time and while she didn’t really care what the neighbours thought she did enjoy the conspiratorial thrill of sneaking away for a clandestine fuck. The leafy avenues of Kowloon Tong, with names such as Rutland Quadrant, were the perfect backdrop.

We both knew the history of the house even then but since neither of us were movie buffs we didn’t give it much more thought.

41, Cumberland Road

This was all some years ago but I do get gentle reminders of her occasionally. There has been talk for some time about turning the building into a Bruce Lee museum, cinema and martial arts complex. The current owner, billionaire Yu Panglin, has agreed to foot the bill providing the government re-write the planning regulations to protect the site. It’s an offer that has been welcomed by Lee’s family and fans alike.

Apart from a rather cheesy statue on the Tsim Sha Tsui waterfront Hong Kong has nothing to commemorate the man who single handedly dragged Hong Kong cinema onto the international screen. But so far the government has remained tight-lipped.

Kowloon Tong is one of the few low rise areas left in Hong Kong. It was built that way for the sole reason that is was directly under the flight path of aircraft making the famously tricky final approach to the old Kai Tak International Airport.

Kowloon Tong. The old runway is visible in the top left corner

Kai Tak has bee closed for some years and building height restrictions are a thing of the past. But as you look down on the area from ‘the rock’ the first thing that springs to mind is the same thing that would spring into the mind of any self respecting financial secretary or property developer.

It was still the same Sikh doorman that had worked there years ago. He was the soul of discretion until I shook his hand and bellowed “long time no see!”

“Is this really Bruce Lee’s old house?” enquired my guest, a Chinese-American lady who was in Hong Kong visiting friends. They had mistakenly thought I would be a safe person to leave her with while they went to work. The doorman beamed and nodded. “This is sooooo cooool” she said as we climbed the stairs.

See also: Mongkok
See also: Wanchai