Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

Click quick and screw your bolt into sweet Elise

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In an effort to make it bigger Taman Sri Skudai, a welder from Johor Baru in southern Malaysia, stuck his bolt through a very appealing nut. Unfortunately after he got a stiffy he couldn’t get the nut off again.

The 20-year-old, who is due to be engaged next week, took himself off to the hospital but staff there had to call the fire department. But, according to Malaysia’s The Star they too were unable to remove it

A few days previously staff at University Malaya Medical Centre in Kuala Lumpur had to call the fire services to try and cut a steel ring off another chaps willy after several attempts to remove it had failed. It is believed he slipped the ring onto his penis to increase his sexual prowess.

Porn and hookers do the trick for me

See also: The Benchmark of Desperation

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Cambodia’s Number One condoms were designed for the benefit of gays an sex workers according to AFP. But it turns out the the water-based lubricant that they come with is an excellent cure for acne.

Twenty-nine-year-old vendor Tep Kemyoeurn told AFP. “After I used it for three days, all of my acne dried up and went away,” she said. “Many people believe in it,” she added.

Khen Vanny, from Phnom Penh, said that women of all ages have taken to using it. “It is very effective. Some people don’t believe in it but people who do really get a good result,” she said. “My youngest sister and my aunt use it too.”

This, of course, is excellent news since the condoms cost 500 riels (about 12 cents) each which is a fraction of the cost of other acne treatments. But it does make me wonder how this was first dicovered. Source:AFP

See also: Condom Capers
See also: Recreational Drugs

A more complete nun

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God does work in mysterious ways. Poor old Father Rungi has had to scrap his idea of a beauty pageant for nuns because his bosses weren’t too keen.

“The local bishop was not happy, but they did not understand me either.” he opined. “It was interpreted as more of a physical thing. Now, no one is saying that nuns can’t be beautiful, but I was thinking about something more complete.”

Meanwhile in Bulgaria Father Cyril Papudov is to be placed under 24-hour surveillance because his particular ‘gift from god’ is a field cannabis plants.

The Father has been arrested seven times but he has never been caught actually cultivating the crop.

One police source told local media: “He is a man of the cloth and so a lot of people don’t want to think badly of him but frankly if someone has a huge crop of cannabis in their back garden it’s highly unlikely they are just sitting there admiring its horticultural properties.”

Me, I’ve just added nuns to my long list of fetishes.

Anna

Naam

Edmilyn

Cosima

Cielo

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I heard this in a bar the other night so grab a beer and click open a gallery before you read it

An accountant gets home late one night and his wife says to him, “Where the hell have you been?”

“I was out getting a tattoo,” he replies.

“Tattoo?” she frowned. “What kind of tattoo?”

“I got a hundred dollar bill on my cock,” he said proudly.

“What the hell were you thinking?” she said, shaking her head in disdain. “Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill on his penis?”

“Well,” he began, firstly I like to watch my money grow; second, once in a while, I like to play with my money; Three, I like how money feels in my hand; and lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want!”

See Also: Philosophy is like an erection
See Also: Annual check-up

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I took this from a Chinese language forum, here is an online translation from http://www2.worldlingo.com:

Before dawn the zero hour little, in the Lantian blue clouds Lantian park fitness area, a year approximately 40 year old man somehow or other makes movement period in a sit-ups fitness facility, unexpectedly instead passes away pulls open the trousers 鍊 to stretch out the male genitals to start on the palm to press, a male genitals stranger card in the panel diameter 1 inch eyelet, finally is unable to extricate oneself approximately, the painful loud groan, alarms the passer-by to report to the police.

After the fire appearance, sees the male male genitals continuously swelling to be unable to contract, does not have under the brilliant plan in the pain to summon the medical team and two anxiously unites hospital doctor to come to assist. Doctor hits the pain killer injection for this man, another doctor uses the needle to insert nearby his/her male genitals the blood vessel bloodletting, but employs two methods to achieve one goal is still unable to let this man’s male genitals pull out naturally to the eyelet.

The original thread here

More: There is something about Hong Kong Parks though this one is a little more understandable

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The night markets in and around Temple Street in Kowloon are very popular with tourists. I caught this enterprising gentleman setting up his stall this afternoon, obviously in anticipation of doing good business and providing some people with happy memories of their stay in Hong Kong.

Read also: Wanchai
Read also: Going for the ball
Read also: The Red Lips bar

The spirit of Sappho lives on in Japan. Click for more

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A court in Athens has ruled that Lesbians can still be gay. Residents of the island of Lesbos had been trying to get the word lesbian, when used as a term for gay people, banned saying it was an insult to their identity. But a court in the Greek capital disagreed. So did Vassilis Chirdaris, lawyer for the Gay and Lesbian Union of Greece who said; “This is a good decision for lesbians everywhere.”

The islands name was given to gay women in recognition of the female poet Sappho, who wrote love poems about both women and men around 600 BC.

Lesbos is a popular gathering place for gay women from around the world particularly the village of Eressos where the poet is said to have been born. I think the residents of Lesbos should loosen up a bit and say thanks for tourist dollars.

Video: The disease of lesbianism
Website review: Shaved Japanese pussy movies