Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

Click me, see me suck and fuck

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I get asked a lot about Filipina girls. They are particularly popular because they have the best command of English of all the girls in Asia.

But I don’t get over to the Philippines very often. It’s a shame really because it’s a lovely country with some really hot babes. But I don’t have much patience with Manila, the country’s capital. It’s an ugly city, awful to try and get around in and there’s bugger all to do in the daytime other than go and look at Imelda’s shoe collection.

But I am still able to get a Filipina fix when I need one. There are plenty of them working out of bars in Hong Kong.

Where to find Filipinas in Hong Kong

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Bijin-Tokei is Japanese for beautiful clock. It features pictures of pretty Japanese girls holding up the time. The picture changes every minute though it is not always a new girl every minute. And they do have their clothes on I’m afraid.

There are numerous versions of it for the iPhone which have been hugely popular in Japan. But now Mac users can get it as a dashboard widget and folks who use iGoogle can add one to their page as a gadget. And you can even customise a version as to add to your blog although the sizing can be a bit flakey.

The only problem is that sometimes they have a trashy advert when you mouseover but if you click on the first two words you can go to the web version of the clock for a slightly larger version of the pic.

Click-a-clit to see twelve more pussies

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So popular was the little gallery that for I made The Art of the Japanese shaved pussy that I decided to make another one.

They are all so edible whether they be schoolgirls, nurses, maids or whatever. Starting at her butt, I like to run the tip of my tongue along the groove giving her clitoris a gentle nibble at the end. It’s nice with chocolate sauce too.

See the previous dozen
See also: 101 shaved Asian pussies you must fuck before you die

Dr Anri Suzuki wants to compensate

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Dr Anri Suzuki, from Tokyo, is an expert in Sino-Japanese history specialising in the Japanese invasion of China in 1937. But the 24-year old feels deeply ashamed of what her countrymen did back then and wants to offer a symbolic compensation.

“I want to cure the wounds of China with my body, and I offer to do this by having sex with Chinese students in Japan,” she told metro.co.uk.

Dr Suzuki, I do realise that I am not Chinese but I have suffered nothing but grief ever since I learned about the terrible events of 1937 in school. I would like nothing better than to find closure, to put those events behind me and I believe you could help. I will be arriving in Tokyo on Tuesday.

Chinese beauty spot Pinpi Poon. Click for sight seeing.

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A bunch of art students were taking pictures of a local beauty at a local beauty spot in Zhengzhou, eastern China. All of a sudden angry farmer and landowner, Hu Wen, comes galloping onto the scene waving a large stick and chases them all away.

“It wasn’t just the students,” he complained. “We get a lot of tourists walking through the valley and they had all stopped too and were snapping away with their cameras and phones.”

Farmer Wen waggles his stick.

He told Britain’s Metro that he didn’t want those kinds of perverts on his land, that the students should be drawing or painting and not taking obscene pictures. He also said he didn’t hit the naked lady, instead he helped her back into her clothes and gave her a lecture on morality.

I bet it helped his bamboo grow though, don’t you?

Click the pic to see my pussy

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.Yes, I always read it as vulvazela too. I don’t think we’re alone. By now anyone watching the world cup is probably sick to death of the sound of the damn things. But they don’t have to be used this way.

There is a slightly smaller but strikingly similar instrument that gets played in bars around Bangkok, and no doubt Pattaya and Phuket as well, every night. It is part of the infamous Pussy Show. The girls usually lay on their backs on the stage and blow these plastic horns through their lovely little cunts.

That, of course, is only one of the tricks that the dextrous damsels can execute. There are at least a couple of dozen tricks the girls do. Some of them, such as pussy blowing out candle, can get a bit tedious. And pussy smoking is not really very attractive to a non-smoker. But I shall cherish the look of alarm I saw on one Australian gentleman’s face as he observed pussy removing beer bottle top. “Can all the girls do that?” he yelped, obviously fearing for his own top.

In fact not all girls can do it. Some of the tricks take a considerable amount of training and those that involve needles and razor blades could be very nasty in the event of a slight mistake.

A while back I took one of these pussy show girls home. I’d asked if she could bring some balloons and darts and other props. I’ll give you a bonus, I promised. “Can not,” she said, “me get sack if mamma-san finds out.” But she was happy to straddle me and demonstrate. “Have strong pussy … see!” she said giving my cock a delicious squeeze.

It was at that point she spied a large bunch of bananas on the table. They were the small sweet ones but they had only just turned yellow. “Good” she said, not too yellow yet. Get down here.” She motioned me to lay on the floor. She herself crouched leaning backwards on the sofa and tried to fire bananas the length of my body and into my mouth.

We got through the whole bunch of bananas but she did score her goal.

See also: Show time at the Long Gun