Seymour Totti’s Foreign Policy

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I picked up some Viagra in Hong Kong. It’s easy enough to get in Bangkok but not all that cheap. In Hongkers it’s cheaper but there is, I’m told, a greater risk from fakes. “Taste it”, I was told “if it tastes bitter it’s the right stuff, if there is no taste it’s fake.

So this afternoon I cracked open a box, pushed one out of it’s blister pack and gingerly nibbled the corner. If you’ve ever tasted an aspirin you’ll know how bad these things can taste. I couldn’t taste a thing. I took a larger nibble, still nothing. Starting to feel rather peeved I threw the rest of the tablet in my mouth and crunched it up angrily … yeeeuch! it was disgusting.

Ten minutes later I was standing on the sky-train opposite a rather delicious looking shop girl. She didn’t know it but the tent pole in the trouser department was rock solid and demanding attention. I was desperately counting the stations to the Darling Massage Parlour, I was going to need a couple of their little brown fucking machines.

The lesson of this story is that if you chew up your viagra it gets into your dick much quicker. Just keep some fruit juice handy to get rid of the taste.